Strategies for Forming Lunchtime Friends: Tips for School

For many students, joining a group for lunch isn't just about finding a seat; it's about building meaningful connections. However, it's not always easy, especially when you're not as close to your classmates. Fear not! This guide offers practical tips on how to make friends to eat with at lunch, even if you're not close to your friends in class.

Building Connections Through Mutual Interests

One effective way to form lunchtime friendships is by sharing common interests. You might think you need to be best friends to eat with someone, but that's not necessarily true. You can start by simply showing interest in your classmates!

First, consider reading a book during lunch. If you're a big reader, take a book from the library or bring one from home. Reading while you eat can not only pass the time but also help you strike up conversations with classmates. If you see other students engrossed in a book, you might join them. This can be a natural way to start a conversation. You could even participate in a discussion about the book or share your thoughts on it.

Sitting Near Friendly Students

Another approach is to sit near individuals who appear to be friendly or welcoming. Observe the lunchroom for a bit and see if someone seems open to conversation. If you notice someone smiling, approach them with a friendly smile of your own. You might start by introducing yourself and sharing a quick tidbit about yourself. For example, you could say something like:

"Hi, I’m Peregrine. I’m into karate, macrame, tuba, cooking, and whatever else interests me."

Sitting in the lunchroom can be a great opportunity to learn about people and see who you might get along with.

Joining an Existing Group

Joining a group for lunch is a different process that requires a bit more finesse. First, locate an empty seat and ask the person closest to you if you can sit there. Then, listen to the conversation for a while to get a feel for the group. Be respectful and not intrusive. Wait for an appropriate moment to share your thoughts, and make sure to keep your comments brief and friendly.

When you have contributed, stop and give others the opportunity to speak. As a guest, remember that you should not correct anyone immediately, even if their statements seem silly. Wait until you're a full-fledged member of the group before risking their disapproval. Being supportive and encouraging can help you earn their trust and acceptance.

Alternative Activities During Lunchtime

If you prefer not to join a group or find sitting in the lunchroom intimidating, you have other options as well. You could study or do your homework during lunchtime, which is perfectly acceptable. However, try to keep an empty space nearby in case someone wants to approach you and sit with you.

Lastly, remember that cliques don't have to govern your lunchtime. If you find a student interesting, don't hesitate to ask if the seat is open. If they explain that it's not, you could engage them in conversation about their interests. This isn't about forcibly joining a clique; it's about finding friends who share common interests or simply enjoy your company.

Lunchtime friendships are not only about finding a place to eat but also about building lasting connections. By employing these strategies, you'll have a greater chance of forming meaningful friendships, and your lunchtimes will become more enjoyable.