The Value of Financial Support in Modern Relationships
Relationships can be beautiful and complex, especially when it comes to financial dependency. What is money, after all? A resource, or the means to acquire more resources? In many partnerships, the person with resources is seen as the breadwinner, while the other partner who utilizes those resources to maintain the home is the homemaker. These roles are not exclusive to any gender; they can be reversed, though this is less common.
Traditional Roles and Reversals
Traditionally, men are often characterized as the breadwinners, but this doesn’t have to be the case all the time. The concept of a breadwinner is about who is primarily responsible for providing financial stability, and this role can easily be reversed. For instance, in a two-income household, both partners can equally or predominantly contribute to the household, depending on their respective incomes.
When two individuals live separately, they consume a lot more resources than when they cohabitate. This was the situation for the couple discussed here, where both the husband and wife were working, leading to a constant state of fatigue. Hiring a maid was a substantial financial commitment, and they went through multiple hires over a seven-year period. Despite these efforts, they eventually realized that a dramatic change was necessary.
Financial Calculations and Life Changes
The couple performed a detailed financial analysis. Together, they brought in a net income of $10,000 monthly, with expenses of $9,500. If one of them were to quit their job, they would still have a financial surplus of $500 per month. This surplus made it possible for one of them to quit their job and focus on homemaking full-time. The freed-up resources allowed them to save money on child care and maid services alone. This practical decision significantly improved their quality of life and even enhanced their sex life.
"There is nothing wrong with committing to someone who can financially support you," said one of the individuals. "You can reciprocate by making his life more manageable and happier for both of you. This is a sound partnership to me."
Gender Considerations
Many women value financial support, especially if they do not earn a high salary. Women with good incomes are less concerned with this issue because they can manage their household without as much financial assistance. Traditionally, women are often paid less than men, which makes financial stability even more crucial for them. Staying at home to care for the children often requires financial support, as these tasks cannot be shared with a third-party service provider as easily as other household chores.
The decision to quit a job for homemaking can be life-changing, as seen with the experiences of this couple and their sister-in-law. After 17 years of being a stay-at-home mother, the wife was convinced that it marked a turning point in her happy married life. On the other hand, the sister-in-law, who was working full-time, was envious of her free time and direct contact with the children. Five years later, the sister-in-law is divorced and less involved with her children.
In conclusion, a relationship built on financial support can lead to a happier, more manageable, and fulfilling life for both parties. It's important to recognize the value of financial stability and to make decisions that work best for the couple involved.
Keywords: Financial support, breadwinner, homemaking, partnership, gender roles